Despite the aches and pains and general discomfort in the last month or so, I am genuinely thankful for this gift. This opportunity to create a new little life, this time to carry our little girl. Pregnancy is nothing short of a miracle which many people may agree with, but not really understand until it is personally experienced. It is amazing and I feel so lucky to have been able to have this time with my baby that could never be duplicated.
I have worked hard to manage my diabetes and to take care of baby girl as much as humanly possible. I feel like I have succeeded. The moment of truth will come next week after I have my c-section and we get to meet her face to face. There's no question now about the mode of delivery. She is measuring too big to try for a vaginal birth and there are too many risks I am not comfortable with taking. Plus my blood sugars have been slightly more erratic, so 38 weeks is the recommendation for delivery. I have a plan with my endo for managing my insulin during surgery and post partum, and I know he will take good care of me. I am in awe that soon we will hold her and love her and she will be a part of this world with us. But I am just a little sad that pregnancy is coming to an end. I will mostly remember it as a wonderful time.
There are many friends and family that have been so supportive throughout the last 9 months. Baby girl will be lucky to have all of you in her life. I'm so thankful for all of the emotional support and well wishes, and grateful for an amazing husband and mother who have both really gone above and beyond for me.
My mom drove me to a ton of appointments so I didn't use my own gas and sat in countless waiting rooms with me when B could not be there. She made meals and gave them to us so I wouldn't have to cook all the time. She helped me clean to prepare for baby girl's big day. She worried when I worried (and even when I didn't) because she's a mom. She's my mom. Always and forever, like I will be baby girl's mom always and forever. I love you, Mom. Thanks for sacrificing your own time and energy and even sleep when worrying for me, even if you didn't have to.
And to my husband, you are my rock and my soft place to fall all at the same time. You endured my moments of despair and anxiety and hot flashes! (There were many nights I slept with the window open and he was bundled up under 2 blankets!) Thank you for going to appointments with me, picking up extra chores around the house, and listening to me talk about being pregnant ALL THE TIME. Thank you for putting up with me getting up a zillion times a night to either run to the bathroom or check my blood sugar or eat a snack. Thank you for sometimes getting those snacks. Thank you for learning how to operate my insulin pump, for tolerating lower carb meals most days for my benefit, for running out to get me juice boxes and granola bars, for canvasing multiple CVS stores to buy glucagon late at night, for putting together all those baby items. Mostly, thank you for being there 100% on this journey and for being my best friend. For loving me and your unborn baby girl. You will make the best daddy and I can't wait to see our little girl in your arms. I hope she has your big heart. If she has your eyes, I'm in trouble!
Much more to come next week with baby girl's arrival!
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